Grief Counseling
Have you lost a loved one and had to adjust to life without them?
Losing a loved one can be a shattering and completely disorienting experience! It may seem like the world is going on without you as you are left wondering how to live without your loved one. Grief may have left you with huge difficult emotions that threaten to overwhelm your life. You may also find yourself working through many upsetting adjustments to your life without your loved one. Additionally, you may find that your support system doesn't know how to support you in ways that really help you feel better.
Have you found yourself wondering, "I knew it would be hard, but I didn't expect it to be this hard."
Even though grief can be completely overwhelming, it is also a very natural process and a compassionate guide can help you find your path forward. Each person's journey is unique, but together we can move toward healing and restoration.
Grief affects every one of us over the course of our lives.
About 2.5 million people die in the United States each year, leaving an average of 5 people significantly affected by their loss. Older adults experience loss at a higher rate than other age groups. Even though we will all have the experience of losing a loved one at least once in our life, our American society is not structured in a way that supports the grieving person. Most people who find themselves mourning an important loss feel rushed and invalidated by people and systems around them. People are often surprised by how long the sadness and difficulties last, and really need support much longer than others anticipate.
The idea of working through the feelings, experiences and memories related to grief often feels too painful to bear, so many people suppress their grief or numb out the difficult feelings using substances, electronics, work, etc. Unfortunately, when we avoid these deeply rooted emotional experiences, they do not go away. Sometimes they creep in and affect our relationships, sometimes they cause us to over/under function in our lives, and often they become physical symptoms. It is best to acknowledge the emotional journey your grief will require, set aside the time and emotional energy for the journey, and find someone to journey with you so you are not alone.
Effective Grief Counseling is Grief Companionship
The most effective way to mourn after a loss is to share your thoughts and feelings (grief) with a compassionate listener, also known as a grief companion. The grief companion HOLDS SPACE for those who are grieving by providing a safe and empathetic presence in which the mourner can begin to explore the terrain of their inner world. The grief companion does not guide the mourner, instead allows the mourner to choose the path.
Companioning is about:
•Being present to another person’s pain
•Going into the wilderness of the soul with another human being
•Honoring the spirit; not just focusing on the intellect
•Bearing witness to the struggles of others and avoiding judgement or direction
•Respecting and allowing disorder and confusion
•Learning from others with compassionate curiosity
Grief Counseling is much less directive than other targeted therapies. The belief we hold when we are companioning someone who is grieving is that they are the expert in their own grief experience. We are there to walk alongside them in the hard big feelings involved with grief, so that they are not alone in their experiencing of their loss.
The end result of grief counseling is RECONCILIATION
Reconciliation involves the integration of the mourner’s new reality of life without their loved one. This represents a million adjustments and transformations in their life, along with the emotions related to them. Mourners never really “get over” their grief, but they become reconciled with the fact that the loss has happened. Reconciliation is a unique process for each loss. The sharp stinging pain of the loss softens to an acknowledged feeling of loss and the mourner experiences renewed energy, confidence and purpose.
"But I can't afford to be completely overwhelmed by my grief!"
One of the most common reasons people have for avoiding getting support for their grief is that they fear emotional overwhelm. They are concerned that if they face the grief emotions and related issues, they will be swallowed up by it and may never be able to come up for air. For some, it seems impossible to imagine feeling better about losing their loved one. And for others, their grief feels like it keeps them connected to their loved one.
We are accustomed to working with all of these scenarios, and believe that grief counseling and companionship can help soften the journey of grief processing so that it is less overwhelming. We know that you need to be functioning in your life as you work through your grief, and we can help you titrate your grief so that it does not overwhelm you. We are able to help you visualize the healing process, metabolize the difficult emotions and embrace your memories with your loved one.
Call today to initiate the grief support you need.
Losing a loved one can be a shattering and completely disorienting experience! It may seem like the world is going on without you as you are left wondering how to live without your loved one. Grief may have left you with huge difficult emotions that threaten to overwhelm your life. You may also find yourself working through many upsetting adjustments to your life without your loved one. Additionally, you may find that your support system doesn't know how to support you in ways that really help you feel better.
Have you found yourself wondering, "I knew it would be hard, but I didn't expect it to be this hard."
Even though grief can be completely overwhelming, it is also a very natural process and a compassionate guide can help you find your path forward. Each person's journey is unique, but together we can move toward healing and restoration.
Grief affects every one of us over the course of our lives.
About 2.5 million people die in the United States each year, leaving an average of 5 people significantly affected by their loss. Older adults experience loss at a higher rate than other age groups. Even though we will all have the experience of losing a loved one at least once in our life, our American society is not structured in a way that supports the grieving person. Most people who find themselves mourning an important loss feel rushed and invalidated by people and systems around them. People are often surprised by how long the sadness and difficulties last, and really need support much longer than others anticipate.
The idea of working through the feelings, experiences and memories related to grief often feels too painful to bear, so many people suppress their grief or numb out the difficult feelings using substances, electronics, work, etc. Unfortunately, when we avoid these deeply rooted emotional experiences, they do not go away. Sometimes they creep in and affect our relationships, sometimes they cause us to over/under function in our lives, and often they become physical symptoms. It is best to acknowledge the emotional journey your grief will require, set aside the time and emotional energy for the journey, and find someone to journey with you so you are not alone.
Effective Grief Counseling is Grief Companionship
The most effective way to mourn after a loss is to share your thoughts and feelings (grief) with a compassionate listener, also known as a grief companion. The grief companion HOLDS SPACE for those who are grieving by providing a safe and empathetic presence in which the mourner can begin to explore the terrain of their inner world. The grief companion does not guide the mourner, instead allows the mourner to choose the path.
Companioning is about:
•Being present to another person’s pain
•Going into the wilderness of the soul with another human being
•Honoring the spirit; not just focusing on the intellect
•Bearing witness to the struggles of others and avoiding judgement or direction
•Respecting and allowing disorder and confusion
•Learning from others with compassionate curiosity
Grief Counseling is much less directive than other targeted therapies. The belief we hold when we are companioning someone who is grieving is that they are the expert in their own grief experience. We are there to walk alongside them in the hard big feelings involved with grief, so that they are not alone in their experiencing of their loss.
The end result of grief counseling is RECONCILIATION
Reconciliation involves the integration of the mourner’s new reality of life without their loved one. This represents a million adjustments and transformations in their life, along with the emotions related to them. Mourners never really “get over” their grief, but they become reconciled with the fact that the loss has happened. Reconciliation is a unique process for each loss. The sharp stinging pain of the loss softens to an acknowledged feeling of loss and the mourner experiences renewed energy, confidence and purpose.
"But I can't afford to be completely overwhelmed by my grief!"
One of the most common reasons people have for avoiding getting support for their grief is that they fear emotional overwhelm. They are concerned that if they face the grief emotions and related issues, they will be swallowed up by it and may never be able to come up for air. For some, it seems impossible to imagine feeling better about losing their loved one. And for others, their grief feels like it keeps them connected to their loved one.
We are accustomed to working with all of these scenarios, and believe that grief counseling and companionship can help soften the journey of grief processing so that it is less overwhelming. We know that you need to be functioning in your life as you work through your grief, and we can help you titrate your grief so that it does not overwhelm you. We are able to help you visualize the healing process, metabolize the difficult emotions and embrace your memories with your loved one.
Call today to initiate the grief support you need.
|
Benediction For Those Who Mourn
May you find breath in your lungs when the pain is too much. May you find strength for each day. May you have a protected space in which to remember your loved one. May you see hope on the horizon, even when it feels impossible. May you be compassionate with yourself when recounting last interactions with your loved one. May you settle gently into a slower pace of life while you grieve. May you feel held by others' words and find protection from insensitive comments and suggestions. May you hold your relief with gentle understanding. May you feel freedom to grieve for as long as you need. May you not journey the pain of your loss alone. |