​Anxiety can feel overwhelming, but understanding the needs of people who struggle with it can bring a sense of hope and healing. Anxiety often originates from an overactive nervous system, which becomes stuck in a state of heightened alertness. For those who experience anxiety, the path to healing involves both addressing the underlying causes and providing the nervous system with the support it needs to return to balance. Here are 10 key needs of anxious people, centered on calming the nervous system and fostering emotional well-being.

1.Safety and Stability: A person with anxiety needs a sense of safety, both physically and emotionally. This means creating a stable, predictable environment where they feel secure. Whether it’s a safe home, supportive relationships, or a calming routine, stability helps the nervous system settle.
2.Validation: Anxious individuals often feel misunderstood or judged. They need their emotions to be validated—knowing that their feelings are real, important, and not something to be dismissed or minimized. Validation creates space for healing by reducing shame and isolation.
3.Calm Environment: A peaceful, low-stimulation environment can do wonders for someone who is anxious. Soft lighting, quiet spaces, and soothing colors help regulate an overstimulated nervous system.
4.Predictability: For people with anxiety, uncertainty can be a major trigger. Predictable routines, clear communication, and planning can ease some of the stress that comes with not knowing what’s next. This gives the brain a break from constantly scanning for danger.
5.Mindfulness and Grounding Practices: Mindfulness, deep breathing, and grounding techniques help anxious individuals bring their nervous systems back to the present moment. These practices engage the parasympathetic nervous system, the body’s natural “rest and digest” mode, helping to calm the fight-or-flight response.
6.Movement and Physical Activity: Gentle movement such as yoga, walking, or stretching can regulate the nervous system and help release built-up tension. Physical activity encourages the production of endorphins and lowers cortisol levels, reducing anxiety and promoting emotional balance.
7.Connection and Support: Anxious people need connection to others. Compassionate, understanding relationships can help them feel less alone in their struggles. Knowing there’s someone who listens and supports them, without judgment, is vital for emotional healing.
8.Adequate Sleep: A nervous system that is constantly on high alert requires rest to repair and restore balance. For anxious individuals, prioritizing healthy sleep habits is critical, as sleep deprivation can exacerbate anxiety symptoms.
9.Nutrition and Hydration: A healthy, balanced diet is essential for nervous system health. Nutrient-dense foods support brain function and emotional regulation, while staying hydrated helps maintain overall physical and mental well-being.
10.Therapeutic Support: Whether it’s talk therapy, medication support, or movement-based therapy, professional support is crucial for those managing anxiety. Working with a therapist can help address underlying issues, teach coping strategies, and guide nervous system healing.

Healing from anxiety is possible, and it begins by recognizing the body’s needs and creating an environment that fosters calm and connection. With the right support—self-care, professional help, and/or community—individuals with anxiety can nurture their nervous system, find relief, and begin to move forward with renewed hope.

When faced with the intense emotions of grief, the nervous system often triggers a fight response. This response is part of our survival mechanism, rooted deeply in our biology, designed to protect us from perceived threats. In the context of grief, the fight response can manifest as irritability, anger, or an overwhelming urge to confront or challenge the pain. While this reaction may seem out of place when dealing with loss, it’s the nervous system’s way of trying to regain control in a situation that feels profoundly disempowering.

Understanding this response is a crucial step in healing. The nervous system, in its attempt to defend us, sometimes misinterprets emotional pain as a physical threat, leading to this heightened state of alertness. Recognizing these reactions allows us to address them with compassion rather than self-criticism. Techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and grounding exercises can help calm the nervous system, shifting it out of the fight response and into a more balanced state. It's important to allow yourself to feel these emotions without judgment, knowing that they are a natural part of the grieving process.

Healing the nervous system after experiencing grief is a gradual process, but it is entirely possible. Engaging in regular self-care practices, seeking support from loved ones, and perhaps working with a therapist can all contribute to restoring a sense of safety and calm in the body. Over time, as the nervous system begins to heal, the intense fight responses will lessen, making space for a gentler and more compassionate experience of grief. This journey of healing is not linear, but with patience and support, it leads to a place of greater resilience and peace.

Grief is a profound emotional experience that can significantly impact both the mind and body. When we encounter the loss of a loved one, our nervous system may respond with a "freeze" reaction, a state where the body and mind become temporarily immobilized. This is a natural response to overwhelming stress and can be understood as part of the "fight, flight, or freeze" survival mechanism. During this freeze response, the brain and body may feel numb or disconnected, and it can be challenging to process emotions or engage with the world. Understanding this reaction is crucial, as it validates the complex physical and emotional responses we experience during grief.

Those who are caring for the mourning may not easily understand the freeze response they see in the mourner. And the mourner may not be able to fully express what they are experiencing or what they need in support. It is important to meet those who are grieving without agenda or expectation because their nervous system is overloaded by grief. Offering to help with practical matters and providing a gentle presence can be most supportive.

It is important to approach this healing process with compassion and patience. The journey through grief and the accompanying neurological responses is deeply personal and cannot be rushed. Healing from the freeze response involves working gently with the nervous system to restore a sense of safety and balance. Techniques such as deep breathing, mindfulness, and gentle physical activity can help re-engage the body and mind. Social connection that is supportive and understanding also helps the nervous system feel safe enough to reengage. Additionally, seeking support from a therapist or counselor who specializes in grief can provide a safe space to explore and process emotions. There is hope for healing, and by acknowledging and addressing the body's natural reactions to grief, individuals can find a path forward that honors their loss while fostering resilience and recovery.

When discussing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) with clients in the aftermath of their traumatic experience, we have noticed a recurring experience. Many times, clients who meet criteria for the diagnosis of PTSD understand this to mean that they will always suffer from the effects of their trauma. All too often, we see a shadow sweep over our client’s faces as shame and fear rise in their bodies. We want to help clarify this particular diagnosis with a message of hope. PTSD is not a lifelong chronic condition, rather a description of how our bodies work to restore safety after trauma. Let’s talk about Post Traumatic Stress and how we can use this information to work toward healing.

Post-traumatic stress (PTS) is a natural response to experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event, impacting both mind and body. When confronted with trauma, the body's nervous system initiates a complex cascade of responses aimed at survival. Understanding the neurobiological impact of trauma can shed light on the symptoms individuals may experience, such as hypervigilance, flashbacks, and emotional dysregulation.

Understanding PTS must involve the nervous system's role in trauma, which illuminates how our body reacts to perceived threats. Traumatic experiences can dysregulate the autonomic nervous system, leading to a state of hyperarousal or dissociation. This dysregulation can disrupt the body's ability to distinguish between real and perceived danger, resulting in ongoing feelings of fear and vulnerability. By learning about the nervous system processes at play, individuals can gain insight into their symptoms and recognize that they are not signs of weakness but rather adaptive responses to overwhelming circumstances. This knowledge can also inform treatment approaches, emphasizing interventions aimed at regulating the nervous system's stress response.

Treatment for PTS often involves therapeutic modalities that target both the mind and body. Polyvagal theory helps to pay attention to nervous system signals and to use this information to create safety in the mind and body. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) helps individuals become skillful in mindfulness, emotional regulation, interpersonal skills and distress tolerance, while somatic experiencing focuses on releasing stored trauma from the body. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Brainspotting harness the brain's natural healing mechanisms to reprocess traumatic memories and alleviate distress. These approaches not only address psychological symptoms but also aim to restore balance to the nervous system.

Despite the challenges posed by PTS, there is hope for recovery. With the right support and resources, individuals can learn to regulate their nervous system responses, reduce symptoms, establish safety and cultivate resilience. It's essential to approach treatment with compassion and patience, recognizing that healing is a gradual process that unfolds over time.

In conclusion, understanding the neurobiological impact of trauma is crucial for navigating post-traumatic stress with compassion and efficacy. By integrating this knowledge into psychoeducation and treatment approaches, we can empower individuals to reclaim agency over their healing journey. Remember, recovery is possible, and there is hope for a brighter future beyond trauma's shadow. Next week’s blog post will be about Post Traumatic Growth. 

In the ups and downs of our lived experience, our nervous system translates and stores the impact of what we experience. Trauma disrupts the delicate balance of our nervous system, leaving behind discordant echoes that reverberate through our bodies, minds, and spirits. Today, we explore a healing journey informed by Polyvagal Theory, illuminating the pathways to safety and healing after trauma.
The Polyvagal Perspective on Trauma
Polyvagal Theory, pioneered by Dr. Stephen Porges, offers a revolutionary lens through which to understand the impact of trauma on the nervous system. At its core lies the recognition that our autonomic nervous system – comprised of the sympathetic and parasympathetic branches – plays a pivotal role in regulating our responses to threat and safety.
Trauma hijacks the autonomic nervous system, propelling us into states of hyperarousal or hypoarousal. Hyperarousal, characterized by the activation of the sympathetic "fight or flight" response, plunges us into a state of vigilance and reactivity. Conversely, hypoarousal triggers the parasympathetic "freeze" response, leading to dissociation and disconnection from our internal landscape.
The Quest for Nervous System Safety
In the aftermath of trauma, reestablishing physical, emotional and relational safety becomes top priority– not just as a concept but as a physiological imperative. Nervous system safety transcends mere physical refuge; it encompasses the restoration of neurophysiological equilibrium, allowing us to navigate the world with a sense of calm and connection.
Central to Polyvagal Theory is the concept of ventral vagal engagement – a state of social engagement and connection fostered by the parasympathetic nervous system. Cultivating ventral vagal pathways is essential for re-establishing safety after trauma, facilitating intimacy, trust, and attunement in our relationships.
In the realm of Polyvagal Theory, healing unfolds within the crucible of safe and supportive relationships. Co-regulation – the reciprocal exchange of physiological and emotional cues – serves as the cornerstone of healing, offering a roadmap for navigating the complexities of interpersonal connection with grace and compassion.
Embodied Resilience and Empowerment
Resilience, from a Polyvagal perspective, is not merely a psychological construct; it's an embodied state of being. Embodied resilience entails attuning to the wisdom of our bodies, harnessing the innate capacity for self-regulation, and integrating our experiences into the tapestry of our being with gentleness and acceptance.
Empowerment begins with understanding. Polyvagal literacy equips us with the knowledge and insight to navigate the terrain of trauma with clarity and agency. It invites us to become fluent in the language of our nervous system, attuning to its cues and messages with curiosity and compassion.
Nurturing Hope Through Nervous System Awareness
In the vast expanse of trauma's aftermath, hope emerges as a guiding light – a beacon of possibility beckoning us towards healing and wholeness. Polyvagal awareness infuses hope with substance, grounding it in the neurophysiological realities of our embodied experience and illuminating the path towards transformation.
In closing, the journey of healing after trauma, as illuminated by Polyvagal Theory, is a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and the transformative power of connection. May we remember that healing is not just a destination but a sacred unfolding – a journey of rediscovery, reclamation, and profound self-compassion.
So, to all those embarking on this nervous system healing path, know that you are not alone. Within the wisdom of your nervous system lies the map to healing and wholeness. And as you navigate the terrain of trauma with courage and grace, may you find solace in the knowledge that safety, connection, and resilience are not just within reach – they are your birthright.
Embrace the journey, dear reader, for within its twists and turns lies the promise of a life reclaimed, a spirit renewed, and a heart restored to its truest rhythm. And it is our privilege to provide guidance, safety and relational support on the path of healing and restoration. 

Written by Allison Harvey

Trauma survivors have gone through something that challenged every part of them, most significantly their sense of safety. Their needs are personal, unique to their personality and circumstances, and often quite delicate. Naming these needs creates space for trauma survivors to feel safe, work toward healing and maintain connection with loved ones.

Physical Needs
On a very basic level, trauma survivors have a need for safety and security. Through their traumatic incident(s), they learned to be on guard and watchful. Trauma survivors need a physical location where they can let their guard down and rest. Trauma survivors also need access to medical and psychological care—professionals to come alongside them and nurture their physical and emotional self back to health. Trauma survivors also need adequate nutrition and sleep. Tending to these basic needs helps to heal a nervous system that felt a strong lack of safety.

Emotional Needs
Those who have survived trauma(s) have a strong need for emotional understanding, empathy and validation. When they are ready to share about their story, they need to be received with compassion, support and validation that says “what you are feeling makes sense to me.” Trauma survivors can also be supported with emotional skills that help them navigate trauma triggers and a large emotional burden while they are healing.

Social Needs
Trauma healing happens within a safe, understanding and supportive relationship(s). Those who have survived trauma need their people to remain open to them. Trauma healing can be messy and indirect, so survivors need compassion and grace to learn to feel safe in relationships again. Survivors may need more accommodations so that they can stay regulated, and this may look like them setting boundaries or asking for certain changes. Connecting with others who are healing from trauma can be very beneficial as well.

​Psychological Needs
Professionals who are supporting trauma survivors should be trauma-informed and have a path toward healing in mind. Psychological care should be gentle and paced by the survivor. Professionals should respect the trauma survivor’s wishes to tell their story or not, knowing that healing can happen either way. Trauma survivors benefit greatly from learning and practicing coping mechanisms and stress management techniques. All of these activities support the survivor to rebuild trust, regain resilience and personal strength. 

Living with depression can be a completely consuming experience. Those experiencing depression can have symptoms like persistent sadness, hopelessness, lethargy, low self-esteem, guilt, worthlessness, and more. These symptoms exist on a spectrum from mild to severe and short to long-term. Living day to day with depression feels heavy, aimless and dark. Often people suffering from depression are told to change their mindset in order to recover. We know that change must come from a much deeper place. In fact, living day to day with depression requires enormous amounts of courage and perseverance, and it helps those who are suffering to have this acknowledged and validated.
 
Depression has several different causes and sources. There are strong inherited patterns for major depression. There are also significant hormonal impacts, especially in post-partum depression and pre-menstrual depressive disorder. Personality also has a strong influence on mood and energy and motivation. All of these different also create causes can also produce a predisposed sensitivity to depression. This blog post is to highlight when life circumstances or traumas are the source of depression. When this is the case, it is the nervous system that is leading the body and mind toward depression. And as such, treatment will need to be focused on healing the nervous system and helping the client work toward a different nervous system state.
 
When the nervous system (read: trauma, overwhelm, life circumstances) is causing depression, healing must happen deeply in the autonomic (involuntary) nervous system. To understand the nervous system impact and the healing of nerves, we need to understand the Window of Tolerance. When we are in the window of tolerance, we are grounded, flexible and able to roll with the ups and downs of life. When we have a good amount of resilience, our window of tolerance is large and we are able to handle significant challenges without becoming too dysregulated. When we are under a lot of stress, our window of tolerance shrinks and we start to experience hyper or hypo arousal. Let’s discuss these nervous system states that exist outside of the window of tolerance.

When we experience overwhelming stressors, we become dysregulated in one of two different directions, sometimes cycling between the two. We can become activated and have a flood of anxious or angry energy wash through our body (hyperaroused). Or we can become deactivated and experience numbness and a shut down response (hypoarousal). This hypoaroused state is the embodiment of depression. This is how stressors or traumas cause depression.
 
Hypoarousal symptoms also exist on a spectrum. On the milder side, we might experience tiredness, brain fog and a slump in energy. When hypoarousal is heightened, one might experience emotional numbness, dissociation, and even catatonia. Sometimes, we end up in this depressed state after an extended period of stress. It’s like our system is saying that it can’t handle that level of activation for that long and it shuts down. In other words, depression can be caused by a nervous system shut down.
 
So, what does our nervous system need when it is in this shut down state? Sometimes, it simply needs a break. It needs rest from the hyper-activated state. The nerve that runs these activation pathways has become raw and overworked and needs to be soothed. The nervous system also has a significant need for connection when it is in this state of shut down. It needs a form of connection that is accepting, supportive and understanding. The nervous system also needs a way to process or integrate the overwhelming emotions that shut it down in the first place. This typically needs to happen at a slow and measured pace, so not to overwhelm again. These interventions serve as a ladder that helps us climb out of the shut down state, closer and closer to that window of tolerance.
 
For a sustained healing process, we also need to take a good look at our lifestyle. When healing from a nervous system shut down, we need to choose a gentle pace of life, avoiding any additional stressors when possible. We can boost our nervous system health with meditation and mindfulness skills. We can invest in sustainable sleep habits that allow our entire system to regenerate every night. Gentle, joyful movement practices can also lift us out of shut down or depression.
 
We at Benediction honor your nervous system and it’s inherent needs and functions, and we know how to move you out of harmful nervous system pathways. We can help you reconnect with yourself and with others by bringing your system back into balance in that lovely window of tolerance. ​